Thursday, June 18, 2009

At Last: The Czar and Keynesian Theory Connection Exposed

The ongoing discussion about Scott Riddle's cattle expelling gas and causing Global Warming in downtown Hubbard continues. This weekend (that would be Saturday only) Scott fired back by sending a note to the Drug Store Liberals copying the City Cafe Conservatives. Note that the Dairy Queen Moderates were left out again because, if you remember, nobody likes them.

The note said, "These are cows. That's why they smell like cows. They smell like money to me. Get over it. Don't like it? I-20 and I-30 go east and west I-45 and I-35 goes north and south. Pick one and get the hell out of here. You guys act like a bunch of Communists."

The Communist word really sets them off at the Cafe. Seems like that is always at least a "three cup" topic. Billy Roy Meechum says, "it seems like Socialist don't mind these Czars as long as they work for the Socialist." Not having the exact figure, he thinks our new leader (Billy Roy's not sure what name the President is using these days) has appointed more than a dozen czars already, and "he ain't even warmed up yet."

Local banker and infrequent coffee drinker, Doyle Lee Wholeman, seems to always attend when the group needs some economic input. Doyle Lee knows economics, "In his early career John Maynard Keynes taught that a country could spend its way out of depression into prosperity, and that is the legacy he left."

He was just warming up, "But near the end of his life he repudiated his own prior views after witnessing the failure of state socialism in the USSR saying, “Lenin is said to have declared that the best way to destroy the Capitalist System was to debauch the currency. By a continuing process of inflation, governments can confiscate, secretly and unobserved, an important part of the wealth of their citizens. There is no subtler, no surer means of overturning the existing basis of society than to debauch the currency. The process engages all the hidden forces of economic law on the side of destruction, and does it in a manner which not one man in a million is able to diagnose.”

Doyle Lee thinks one man's inflation is another man's deflation and that Hubbard will get the short end of that stick.

As is usual, there weren't many questions when Doyle finished speaking. In fact, what usually follows is Lewis Glenn Teagle saying, "how about them Horns?".

Think about it,


Tuesday, June 16, 2009

Making Bets on Obama vs.Osama

What with running the auto companies, banks, and the Iranian election folks at the cafĂ© are wondering whether Obama will capture Osama bin Laden real quick like he said he would back before the election. Hubbard folks have long memories and don’t like Osama at all (that’s with an S). Candidate Obama's pledge to hunt him down was music to their ears and probably got him 20-30 votes in Hubbard last November.

Now with all the talk about health care being a "ticking time bomb", it is just hard not to get confused. When it comes to health care there is one group in town represented by Morris Lee DuBerry whose slant is a little different, “Life should NOT be a trip to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in a pretty body, but rather to skid in sideways – a cool one in one hand – a smoke in the other - body pretty much used up, worn out and yelling 'YAA HOO, What a Ride'’.

Looks like Morris Lee might get sideways with President Obama on any kind of mandatory preventive health plan.

Back to Osama, most of the folks would like to see Obama spend a little more time on national defense things. Hubbard folks believe in making your fences horse-high, pig-tight, and bull-strong. They sure don’t believe in vacationing the Gitmo guys in Bermuda nor spending over $10 million per head to send them to some darn Pacific Island called Palau. On top of that you have our friends down south floating those funny cigarettes across the Rio Grande (actually the folks are about 50% mixed on this one between Willie's followers and George Strait's fans).

Heck, the Hubbard folks are so negative about Obama’s search for Osama that the local barber and bookie, Spooks Bounds, is giving 3 to 1 odds that O. J. finds Nicole’s killer before Obama lives up to his campaign promise to nab bin Laden.

Think about it,


Monday, June 15, 2009

A Short but Important Warning Picked Up at the Cafe

If you get an email titled "nude photos of Sarah Palin," don't open it. It could contain a virus.

If you get an email titled "nude photos of Nancy Pelosi," don't open it. It could contain nude photos of Nancy Pelosi.

You can't be too careful with these computers.