Thursday, September 24, 2009

Why Netanyahu Keeps Having to Change His Underwear

Billy Roy says he knows an Obama voter who is so dumb he sold his pick up truck to get gas money. The same guy gave this answer when he was criticized for having sex with his third cousin. "If it bothers people that much they should quit counting."

Meanwhile, the folks at the Cafe are following the Middle East very closely. Particularly the Bible scholars are keenly interested in this part of the world for obvious reasons.

Obama met with leaders from Israel and the Palestinians Tuesday with Iran’s nuclear threat hovering over Israel. The same day Iran's leader, Mahmoud Ahmadinejad, said he would "cut the hand" of anyone who attacked Iran while it was reported he was delivering weapons , including sophisticated roadside bombs, to terrorists in Afghanistan.

Here is the Cafe's description of the tight and complex obstacle course (known as following diplomatic channels to gain world support) that Israel must negotiate to insure their safety from Iranian nukes:

1. Obama must set a date and keep his commitment that if Iran does not stop their nuclear development then the US will lead sanctions against Iran, and soon (like in 2-3 mos.).

2. Then Russia and China in the Security Counsel will vote down any sanctions by the UN making it necessary for Obama to lead an effort to get major countries to enforce tough sanctions outside of the UN. And of course, the French are already pushing back while the Leftist U. K. Prime Minister is doing away with a nuclear sub to show the world how he supports Obama's disarmament plan.

3. Then the sanctions must be put in place and enforced to the degree that the Iranian people will overthrow their government rather than risk an Israeli attack. Yes you read it right, an overthrow is needed since the current Iranian leaders will never give in to sanctions.

4. Then all of this must happen before Russia supplies the Iranians with a Missile Defense System that would keep Israel from being able to strike Iranian nuclear targets and/or Iran gets deliverable nuclear weapons. (Putin must back down like Obama did in Eastern Europe with the Czechs and Poles---fat chance!!)

5. Then Israel must get at least some degree of support from the US for the Israeli’s to strike Iran alone.

6. Then the strikes must be successful against dispersed and well guarded nuclear facilities.

7. Step 7, Israel then gets to kick their extra point by surviving to fight again.

So there you are. Does all this make you dizzy. Well think what it does to Netanyahu's undershorts. The good news is that Netanyahu is the right man for the job. He is a real leader and cares deeply about Israel's survival. He can even speak without a teleprompter and actually answer real questions.

Butch Jackson, the Cafe's offical handicaper, says "US elections have consequences which make even a leader like Netanyahu a 2 to 1 underdog just on step #1 since he is dependent on the Telepresident. However, failure will not be Obama's fault since no Teleprompter could handle this kind of complexity. To give the Israelis even money to get through this maize to survival, the US would have to have a real President."

Think about it,



Billy Roy thought our bombs missed Moammar Kadafi a few years back. After seeing him at the UN yesterday, "it looks more like it was a direct hit."


  1. so basically a complex international issue must now be handled by a man who can not speak well in public without a teleprompter.... YIKES

  2. Perhaps a parliamentary system would be more appropriate for the US at this time. Not sure we can wait another 3 years.